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My Zany Years Spent Working in Tinsel Town

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Beverly Hills

Woah Nelly…I’m Dizzy

August 4, 2013 by MsCheevious

Whoa Nelly is an understatement.

My head has been spinning out of control off and on for over a month. And I mean that in the literal sense.

I am DIZZY.

Yep.

But let’s dispense with all manner of revelry right now, shall we? I am dizzy, and I am also blonde. That doesn’t make me a dizzy blonde.

You wouldn’t be alone to begin to think maybe I have a little Munchausen’s thing going on after all of the surgeries and procedures I’ve had in the last couple of years..  

I would think so myself, if the rest of the world weren’t so damned upside down right now. It’s tough to navigate life while I bounce around it like a cartoon character in a bumper-boat pinball game.

The doctor thought at first it was something simple like positional vertigo, which would mean I would simply do exercises to reset the crystals in the brain, bringing them back to normal (as in this video). Now, after extensive “dizziness” testing with their Audiologist, she thinks she’s ruled that out and believes I have an inner ear condition called Superior Canal Dehiscence (“opening” in plain English), and if this is the case, the only fix is surgery.

Shit.

I’ve had enough surgery in the last couple of years of my life to stuff one little tiny procedure at a time down the throat of every doctor in LA until they all become rolly-polly pudge-meisters, wobbling down the block and floating up into the air in Beverly Hills.

Floating Pudgy Doctors

 

This is some serious shit.

But I’ve decided surgery is NOT how this is going down.

I may be dizzy, but I haven’t lost my mind….

….

Just…

…

don’t say a word.

….

My point is, I’ve decided I am in charge of my body, and I will be the one to decide what is wrong with my ear (if anything). It is not going to be the imperative surgery situation the docs are thinking.  Since this fabulous news, I’ve been doing those exercises and my brain has been “engaging” with my little inner ear canals and other body parts, to tell them point blank:

“No, ear, you do NOT have any sort of “opening.” This is me, your BRAIN here, and I am in charge. I’ll say when there is an “opening” you hear? (pun intended). But we’ve got to stick together. So here is the plan:

Bone: These openings happen because of lack of bone, so you are in charge of making sure you are fortified so there ARE no… openings…  whatever is going on down there, it’s your job to strengthen the front lines and fortify that canal!  Do you hear me? If you need resources, talk to me… I’ll send extra blood, whatever else I’ve got… but you are NOT going to fall apart here.. do you understand?  

My little ear and all of your little parts: Well we are all here for you.  We are not going to let you go down, so by GOD man, buck up! Toughen up and we will get through this together!  

And finally, blood, tissue, and every other part: Pay attention!  Stand guard! Be ready to jump when I say jump. If we need you it’s going to be fast. If you need something get me a message any way you can, so I can send in reinforcements.

In the meantime I’ll be over here balancing the crystals with those exercises.  The medics say that isn’t the problem, but I believe it could help, so by God that’s what we’re going to do.

All of you listen up: I don’t know what kind of mayhem has been going on here that this even happened, but we are going to straighten this up STAT. Do you hear me?” 

This time next week, I plan to have a whole new story of a non-dizzy blonde who is large and in CHARGE, come hell or high water.

NEWS FLASH!

What could be better than an egg full of money?  Post: http://wp.me/p102Du-2M8
What could be better than an egg full of money?

Starting this week, I began posting a short, witty paragraph or two a day for a segment called the Daily Mischief here on Ms. Cheevious.  Additionally, M.C. Nugget has agreed to take a random photo a day for a segment called Daily Nugget.  I hope you’ll pay a visit regularly (there are links to all of the stories for Daily Mischief and Daily Nugget on the navigation of any page of MsCheevious.com). In keeping with our once-a-week-subscription email policy (because, who the hell wants too many emails in their inbox, right?) I do not plan to email these posts out.  Daily Mischief is loads of fun, with  quickie stories like “A work at home situation that needs resolution” and “The day we succumbed to television peer pressure,” and the Daily Nugget has offered us such Pulitzer prize candidate photos (at least we think so) as “Which Came First? The Chicken or the Egg Full of Money?” and other such nonsensical fun images. Why? Because we can.

 

See you next week (unless you show me how much you love me by visiting the Daily Mischief and Daily Nugget) my lovely little turnips.

xoxo,

Ms. Cheevious

aka Lisa Jey Davis

Editor in [Mis]Chief

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Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: Beverly Hills, doctors, surgery

Capers of the Sherwood Kind

May 18, 2010 by MsCheevious

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Okay.  I know.  I have too many monikers.  Ms. Cheevious, Yummy, etc.  But did you know I am also a SUPER HERO?

Yep!

And with that, comes another moniker, or alias of course. In my case it is “Brat-Tay.”

I’m just ONE of the Sherwood Girls.

Perhaps you heard of us?

We’re Smar-Tay, Ice-Tay, Pah-Tay, Hot-Tay, Sport-Tay, Zes-Tay and MOI — Brat-Tay (because we all know I LOVE to get my way).  Yeah.  We’ve been fighting bad guys —  well — just about all our lives.

We spent some time this weekend trying to vacation… and wouldn’t you know we were accosted by a Mayan Warrior??  We were forced to go all Super Hero up in his grill, just so we could get back to Beverly Hills and our Sprinkles Cupcakes!  Can YOU believe it? HA!

Watch it and enjoy!

If you cannot view this (some email subscribers) follow this link, then be sure to come back and comment! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kVasjwt1wfM

Have a fantastic week everyone!  Don’t do anything to make the Sherwood Girls get all up in your grill!  Stay tuned for more Sherwood Girl Capers!

Love you people!  Mmmmmppphhhhuuuuhhhh!

xoxo,

Ms. Cheevious

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Blog content copyright 2009, LISA JEY DAVIS a.k.a. Ms. Cheevious

Filed Under: Entertainment, Girls Gone Wild, Hip Chicks, Hollywood Events, Travel, Uncategorized Tagged With: Beverly Hills, Brat-Tay, Jetta, Mayan Warrior, Ms. Cheevious, MsCheevious, Sherwood, Sprinkles Cupcakes

Shrimp on the Barbie Baby

June 5, 2008 by MsCheevious

You know, when I first heard that saying “Shrimp on the Barbie,” it actually conjured up images of a Barbie Doll with a piece of shrimp on it.  I’m sure there are psychological implications to this, especially given my deviant nature at times, but suffice it to say, once I thought of that saying (don’t ask me how on earth I thought of “Shrimp on the Barbie” after lying in a bed of Kleenex, having sneezed and coughed for the past eighteen hours.  Perhaps it was a drug induced hallucination of Barbies and shrimp dancing around my brain, or maybe it’s just because I LOVE Barbie.  I think Mattel should create a Barbie GPS.  One that is pink and says things I can relate to, like “Time to stop and apply lip gloss!” or “No! Don’t go down there! You’ll get mud on your Jimmy Choos!” ), my mind went on a rabbit trail from there.  It took me to thoughts of my Memorial Day Weekend.  It was my first holiday weekend since moving into my new condo in Los Angeles. 

One of my best friends (the one who is an on-air personality on national television – the one I can’t mention here – ha ha) was in town from New York, and we planned a little soire at a mutual friend’s house.  Okay – not just any house – and not just any friend.  He’s pretty cute too (always a bonus) and a perfect host.  This friend’s house is up in the hills of Beverly Hills and has a panoramic view of Los Angeles from its pristinely landscaped back yard.  This view can be seen while sipping Pina Coladas in the hot tub, lounging near the pool, or from any point in the back yard.  Not only can you see a spectacular array of city lights on a clear night, but you can see some of the elaborate mansions on the rolling hills across the way.  As I scanned the breathtaking view on that night I couldn’t help but wonder what each of the members of these households were up to in that very moment.  Were celebrities afoot, hobnobbing and congratulating each other on their latest projects as they sampled the latest and greatest Wolfgang Puck fare?  Were they welcoming friends and family for a little shrimp on the barbie and some delicious daiquiris? 

Cool Pad in Beverly Hills

Here is our host’s pad.  Very nice place. 
The photo, taken by our mutual friend, doesn’t do justice to the view, but you get the picture.

Or could it be that the most likely scene in this belly of affluence was that of a desolate housewife sitting alone in her bathrobe, smoking cigarettes on her balcony looking at the fantastic view her world has created for her, only to also create a husband whose hunger for status, success and an unhealthy appetite for celebrity leads him astray time and again with every next top model or actress – or even actor? 

I allowed my mind to go to this dark and very real place for some in Tinsel Town for only a moment, before it was so pleasantly interrupted by a delicious Malibu Rum and diet Coke offered by my adorable host.  ‘Ahh, Malibu’ I sighed with relief. Not only was I relishing in the rum, but thoughts of the beach, the ocean’s waves in all their majesty, and the burnt orange and fuchsia sunsets so beautifully crafted by the unique attributes of Southern California’s carbon footprint.  It may not be paradise to some, but I do love the landscape here, even with all the faults so many are quick to point out.

So, anyway.  I got to the party a little in the dark as to what we’d be cooking up.  My girlfriend said she had it covered, so I showed up in time to help get things going.  This friend of ours is a total bachelor.  It’s almost criminal for such a magnificent kitchen, complete with indoor grille and all the accoutrements for fabulous culinary creations, to belong to a bachelor who doesn’t even cook.  I tried not to drool as I prepped the lettuce and tomatoes for the burgers.  He is so much the stereotypical male bachelor, too.  Poor guy.  He told the story of how he’d been in the house for almost ten years, when his parents came for the holidays recently.  His mom went to cook a holiday dinner only to find the oven did not work.  “Please tell me you have used this oven before,” he mimicked his mother’s disdain over his pathetic bachelor state. Of course he hadn’t.  As a matter of fact, he even expected my friend and I to actually do the grilling for our little group.  This is where I stepped in.  I protested that idea vehemently.  I am a little traditional, in the sense of male and female roles.  Go figure.  Me, the jet-set, marketing and PR professional, who actually likes to be valued and cherished, and treated special!  As traditional as I am, I don’t go so far back to the golden olden days, that I am willing to carry buckets of water from the well, or worse yet, light the grille and flip the burgers.  In my book, that’s where the men take over.  Either that, or I stay inside and use the fancy indoor grille, which works just fine as well.  🙂  Once the guys took charge of the burgers on the outdoor grille, we were all set. 

So, do you think it’s outrageous that I am actually so old fashioned? Listen, I am all for being liberated, and we all know I’ve exercised that liberation on more than one occasion (in many fun and interesting ways!)  Even though I am strong and able, I LIKE a man to take over when things intimidate me, or seem bigger than me.  Or if I cry.  Ha ha.  I LOVE to defer to my man.  I suppose it could be construed as a bit of a double standard.  I want to be treated special, like a precious commodity.  I also want to do what makes me happy when I want.  But doesn’t everyone?  I want to be able to take off the Paris if I’m so inclined.  Of course, if I am with someone, I most certainly want them to come along, but I am not opposed to seeking adventure on my own once in a while, too.  The latter tends to intimidate, or infuriate men.  They can’t seem to wrap their mind around the concept that a strong independent, intelligent woman is deserving of being cherished, loved and treated like they (the men) are so lucky to be with them.  Is that so much to ask?  Like Sheryl Crow says, “Lie to me.  I promise I’ll believe.”  Just make me believe I am precious.  Dammit.  ha ha!  You know, growing up, my family called me Super Brat.  Then a little later a brother-in-law elevated the title to Wonder Brat.  It was a compliment.  I truly believe my family sat back with jaws on the floor at the way my life unfolded.  HA!

I’m really not a brat.  I just know what I want.  Right now, I’d like to be able to stop the coughing and sneezing.  I want to go for an exhilerating hike or bike ride.  I could even love the hot tub right about now.  But alas, I must get back to work!

So, I went from Shrimp on the Barbie (and all that implies) to the lifestyles of the rich and famous (or not), and then ended with an analysis of – ME (albeit distorted and just-as-drug-induced as my Barbie hallucinations.) How utterly apropos. 

I am in Aspen this week, and will be in Vegas for next week’s post.  THAT will be fun!  I received the footage from my underwhelming appearance on Entertainment Tonight, and still haven’t decided whether I will post it or not.  More later on that.  Perhaps next week I’ll chat about my escapades at Book Expo.  Or not. Regardless, it’ll be GOOD.

Have a great weekend everyone!

xoxo – or as an old boyfriend use to say “mmmmmphhhuuuhhhh!”
Ms. Cheevious 

[digg=http://digg.com/celebrity/Shrimp_on_the_Barbie_Baby]

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Blog content copyright 2008, LISA JEY DAVIS a.k.a. Ms. Cheevious

 

Filed Under: Blogroll, Hip Chicks, Single Moms, Single Women Tagged With: Barbie, Beverly Hills, Mattel, Shrimp on the Barbie

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