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Woah Nelly…I’m Dizzy

August 4, 2013 by MsCheevious

Woah Nelly…I’m Dizzy

Whoa Nelly is an understatement.

My head has been spinning out of control off and on for over a month. And I mean that in the literal sense.

I am DIZZY.

Yep.

But let’s dispense with all manner of revelry right now, shall we? I am dizzy, and I am also blonde. That doesn’t make me a dizzy blonde.

You wouldn’t be alone to begin to think maybe I have a little Munchausen’s thing going on after all of the surgeries and procedures I’ve had in the last couple of years..  

I would think so myself, if the rest of the world weren’t so damned upside down right now. It’s tough to navigate life while I bounce around it like a cartoon character in a bumper-boat pinball game.

The doctor thought at first it was something simple like positional vertigo, which would mean I would simply do exercises to reset the crystals in the brain, bringing them back to normal (as in this video). Now, after extensive “dizziness” testing with their Audiologist, she thinks she’s ruled that out and believes I have an inner ear condition called Superior Canal Dehiscence (“opening” in plain English), and if this is the case, the only fix is surgery.

Shit.

I’ve had enough surgery in the last couple of years of my life to stuff one little tiny procedure at a time down the throat of every doctor in LA until they all become rolly-polly pudge-meisters, wobbling down the block and floating up into the air in Beverly Hills.

Floating Pudgy Doctors

 

This is some serious shit.

But I’ve decided surgery is NOT how this is going down.

I may be dizzy, but I haven’t lost my mind….

….

Just…

…

don’t say a word.

….

My point is, I’ve decided I am in charge of my body, and I will be the one to decide what is wrong with my ear (if anything). It is not going to be the imperative surgery situation the docs are thinking.  Since this fabulous news, I’ve been doing those exercises and my brain has been “engaging” with my little inner ear canals and other body parts, to tell them point blank:

“No, ear, you do NOT have any sort of “opening.” This is me, your BRAIN here, and I am in charge. I’ll say when there is an “opening” you hear? (pun intended). But we’ve got to stick together. So here is the plan:

Bone: These openings happen because of lack of bone, so you are in charge of making sure you are fortified so there ARE no… openings…  whatever is going on down there, it’s your job to strengthen the front lines and fortify that canal!  Do you hear me? If you need resources, talk to me… I’ll send extra blood, whatever else I’ve got… but you are NOT going to fall apart here.. do you understand?  

My little ear and all of your little parts: Well we are all here for you.  We are not going to let you go down, so by GOD man, buck up! Toughen up and we will get through this together!  

And finally, blood, tissue, and every other part: Pay attention!  Stand guard! Be ready to jump when I say jump. If we need you it’s going to be fast. If you need something get me a message any way you can, so I can send in reinforcements.

In the meantime I’ll be over here balancing the crystals with those exercises.  The medics say that isn’t the problem, but I believe it could help, so by God that’s what we’re going to do.

All of you listen up: I don’t know what kind of mayhem has been going on here that this even happened, but we are going to straighten this up STAT. Do you hear me?” 

This time next week, I plan to have a whole new story of a non-dizzy blonde who is large and in CHARGE, come hell or high water.

NEWS FLASH!

What could be better than an egg full of money?  Post: http://wp.me/p102Du-2M8
What could be better than an egg full of money?

Starting this week, I began posting a short, witty paragraph or two a day for a segment called the Daily Mischief here on Ms. Cheevious.  Additionally, M.C. Nugget has agreed to take a random photo a day for a segment called Daily Nugget.  I hope you’ll pay a visit regularly (there are links to all of the stories for Daily Mischief and Daily Nugget on the navigation of any page of MsCheevious.com). In keeping with our once-a-week-subscription email policy (because, who the hell wants too many emails in their inbox, right?) I do not plan to email these posts out.  Daily Mischief is loads of fun, with  quickie stories like “A work at home situation that needs resolution” and “The day we succumbed to television peer pressure,” and the Daily Nugget has offered us such Pulitzer prize candidate photos (at least we think so) as “Which Came First? The Chicken or the Egg Full of Money?” and other such nonsensical fun images. Why? Because we can.

 

See you next week (unless you show me how much you love me by visiting the Daily Mischief and Daily Nugget) my lovely little turnips.

xoxo,

Ms. Cheevious

aka Lisa Jey Davis

Editor in [Mis]Chief

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Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: Beverly Hills, doctors, surgery

About MsCheevious

Ms. Cheevious is the alter-ego of Lisa Jey Davis (former publicist, and television talent manager, current award-winning writer & author, & health and fitness pro). Though Ms. Cheevious has become known for humor via the blog and social media, offering a lighter and brighter look at life… the blog was originally a precursor to Lisa Jey's long overdue book "Ms. Cheevious in Hollywood" which offers a fabulous, funny peek into what really goes on behind the scenes in Hollywood… a Hollywood with Lisa Jey and her funny “serendipities” in it. Think Lucille Ball meets Chelsea Handler meets the girl next door (with a little chocolate and vodka). It depicts with hilarity the innocent mistakes Lisa Jey made when launched back into the big, bad single jungle, as an unassuming single-mother in the City of Angels. It’s also about the beautiful, interesting life she led while her loving, incredible sons kept her grounded and sane amid fantastic events, new friends, parties and field trips. It also shows the turmoil and heartbreak that comes with dating and single mom life. All blog content © 2015 Ms. Cheevious aka Lisa Jey Davis

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Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Onisha Ellis says

    August 5, 2013 at 10:32 am

    You tell those body parts Ms Cheevious! I am a big believer in mind over matter. I was so fed up with being in labor I began stopping the pains (dumb, I know but WHO is rational during labor>)

    • Ms. Cheevious says

      August 5, 2013 at 10:38 am

      haha @onishaellis:disqus! How’d that work out for ya? LOL… Yeah me too… BIG mind over matter gal here…

  2. Judy Sherwood says

    August 5, 2013 at 11:16 am

    Now THAT is what I am talking about! Tell that ear and whole body who is boss, give it an “ear full” hehe. I also want to know where to sign up for these little “Nuggets” and when they will start? Or will they be in your posts? And by the way, I love daily “Mischief”!!

    • Ms. Cheevious says

      August 5, 2013 at 11:20 am

      @judysherwood:disqus, damn straight I am the boss! WOOT!! And the Daily Mischief and Daily Nugget are on the site each day. Come to the home page to see each day’s, and find a list of them by clicking on them in the menu of the site! 🙂 xxoo

  3. RebekahLyn says

    August 5, 2013 at 3:55 pm

    Vertigo is the pits! I had a bout of it after knocking my head on the top bunk while decorating my dorm room for Christmas. Feel better!

    • Ms. Cheevious says

      August 5, 2013 at 4:07 pm

      i feel for you rebekah! it definitely is! xo

  4. Luann Robinson Hull says

    August 5, 2013 at 6:35 pm

    I love your attitude! You go girl!

    • Ms. Cheevious says

      August 5, 2013 at 6:36 pm

      thanks lulu! xo

  5. Melanyb12 says

    August 5, 2013 at 6:53 pm

    Ooooh yucky! As I was reading the first part I was going to say that it sounded like an inner ear infection. Keep up the positive attitude and hope you feel better soon. I know how annoying that “dizzy” feeling is. Good on you for more posts – now I need to catch up.

    • Ms. Cheevious says

      August 7, 2013 at 8:54 am

      Yeah – it ain’t for sissies… Thanks for commenting love. XO

  6. Eaeme says

    August 6, 2013 at 9:47 pm

    I can crawl under the car and out fussing with wires with no problems, but when I stand up straight after washing white sox in the bathroom sink I get this dizzy spell so I decided to not wash sox any more. What triggers your spells? And gravity be damned too.

    • Ms. Cheevious says

      August 7, 2013 at 8:53 am

      Hey Eaeme – not sure yet what triggers it. Yours sounds like either a low blood pressure thing or possible slight dehydration. Mine is sort of always present right now. It likes to THINK it is anyway. HA!

      • Eaeme says

        August 7, 2013 at 8:54 pm

        Reminds me of a drive back from Mammoth a few years ago when
        all of a sudden I started seeing double, couldn’t tell which lane I was in without shutting or covering one of my eyes.
        Went to my trusty and trusted ophthalmologist. He said it’s caused by a damaged nerve fiber from the eye into some visual cortex and we will just have to wait and see if it heals. Thank whomever you like most, in about two weeks something healed and suddenly my vision was normal again. It has remained normal since. Hope you get lucky too. All the best.

        • Ms. Cheevious says

          August 13, 2013 at 9:21 pm

          thanks Eaeme! xo

  7. M.C. Nugget says

    August 7, 2013 at 8:50 am

    love the pudgy docs! HA!

    • Ms. Cheevious says

      August 7, 2013 at 8:54 am

      I knew you would. 🙂 xo

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